Categories
Recovery

Attempting To Push Faster

Today is the start of a new week and I wanted to start it with a bang in terms of ED recovery! πŸ’₯ πŸ’₯πŸ’₯πŸ’₯πŸ’₯πŸ’₯πŸ’₯
Overcoming an eating disorder can be feel like a painfully slow process at times and the go low and slow approach that is often used in traditional treatment is one I have tried on several attempts to overcome this illness in the past and for me it just does not work!
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Going slow in the incremental increases and weight gain just leaves too much room for anorexia to sneak in – meal plans quickly become restrictive in themselves (even if they are more food than before) and the slow weight gain makes every extra lb gained a longer and more torturous process than it needs to be!
Plus, I usually end up getting bored and trying to get on with living a life long before my body and brain are actually ready and inevitably relapse happens.
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Having learnt so much about this illness, the science and what recovery really takes over the past years I know that for me to truly get well I need to make rapid and more extreme changes.
πŸ’ͺπŸ’₯πŸ’ͺπŸ’₯πŸ’ͺπŸ’₯πŸ’ͺ
When increasing just a tiny amount is panic inducing, sitting for a short time feels torturous and gaining just a bit of weight causes anxiety- surely facing those fears in more extreme ways is better!
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Plus – I have given over a decade to this shitty illness already… I don’t want it to take more of my life when I have the power to change it.
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So, today is extreme change day!
I have set myself a much higher minimum calorie intake level to hit for the day and the aim too is to be sitting as much as possible!

I know this won’t be easy but it is more than necessary and after years of hunger and torturous movement compulsions, I reckon my body deserves a bit of food and a rest!

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