Fear & Anxiety In Recovery Rewiring / Neuroplasticity

Facing The Milkshake Fear

A Post Originally Written For Instagram Towards The Start Of My Recovery:

A trip out today for a bit of nourishment…
This banana milkshake was the eventual result!

This was definitely a harder challenge on more than one level…

Firstly, when I ordered it I had no idea what it was going to look like… but thought a milkshake sounded like something I could handle!

Secondly, unlike other options, there were no nutritional values attached to the milkshakes. I’m a compulsive calorie counter and find it hard to consume things without knowing the arbitrary numbers, so ordering this had an extra layer of anxiety attached.

Once we ordered, the sensible woman taking the order asked the young (work experience?!?) lad to make the milkshake.
This could go in any direction I now thought!

Seeing the ice cream come out the freezer my panic starts to ramp up- I thought I ordered a milkshake – not a sundae!

Tempted to cancel and swap my order I sat down to wait.

And wait we did. …
I think every bit of intense preparation went into this milkshake but eventually it appeared. More terrifying than I expected, I took deep breaths and ignored temptations to swipe large parts of the cream from the top. 
Instead I got stuck in!

It was all good in the end and this was definitely a rewiring exercise that can only inch me closer to recovery…

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