I wrote this post almost a year ago but did not publish it. It is about a state in recovery that has been present at various points in the recovery process… It is one that can trigger all kinds of feelings and judgements (including guilt, wrong-doing, shame, frustration) if we allow it to. This is […]
Category: Emotion
Too frequently, I see people with eating disorders who are bravely attempting recovery from this all consuming, life changing and poorly understood illness, express shame. They feel ashamed that they have an eating disorder in the first instance, ashamed of what the illness has done to their life or the impact it has had on […]
Very often nowadays, you will hear people say, ‘I am committing to my recovery‘ or recovery coaches might say, ‘you have to commit!‘… And it sounds great doesn’t it? It sounds wonderful. To be committed to the process and committed to our recovered selves… But what does it really mean when we talk about commitment […]
A personal post… When I was going through my early stage of intense recovery last year, I stayed with my parents for a few months. And although I owned my recovery, my parents were there, providing emotional support and regrettably (for me now) taking the brunt of the pure, raw and very real emotions that […]
In the past, whenever people have suggested I might like to practice daily ‘gratitude’ – perhaps in a nice journal or using some other method, externally I might have smiled and nodded, while inside I was thinking, ‘f**k off’. ‘Practicing gratitude’ to me sounded hippy, woo woo and quite frankly, when you are miserable living […]
This post is a sharp reality hit about eating disorder recovery. I write this post because recognising how real and unavoidable this truth is, if full recovery is ever to actually be realised, took me far too many years in my recovery but it need not be so for others. And the truth I want […]
Within an eating disorder, the ‘martyr complex’, in which people will act like a martyr to the point of self destruction is a feature seen more often than not. ‘Martyr complex’ is a recognised term to describe people who seek out the feeling of being a martyr, putting others needs above their own suffering as […]
This morning I woke up with bad body image. I had discomfort with my body, a general feeling of being bigger and a sense of negativity about it all… I felt more aware of my size and uncomfortable both mentally and physically. It is actually unusual for me to experience poor body image days like […]
There are many things common to most of us with an eating disorder but one of these is that we spend so much time (too much time!) seeking and let’s be honest, arguing over, the ‘right way’ to do recovery. Do we go ‘all in’ (I hate that term)? Do we follow a meal plan? […]
As humans, our brains are hardwired to dislike uncertainty in any aspect of our lives and I find this an interesting topic and particularly relevant here as the ability to tolerate uncertainty is key in eating disorder recovery. Every human brain loves certainty. Our basic survival brain perceives uncertainty as a danger and so it […]
