Categories
Anxiety In Recovery Fear Foods Lower Level Movement / Exercise Other Eating Disorder Behaviours Recovery Restriction Rewiring

Is The “Permission” To Recover Permanent?

Deep down, all I’ve wanted to do for years is spend time curling up in a blanket, being warm, feeling safe while eating good food… but in the illness this freedom was never ‘allowed’…. Well, not without intense eating disorder generated fear and anxiety attached so it was barely even contemplated. Now I give myself […]

Categories
Anxiety In Recovery Emotion Motivation Recovery Rewiring

A Resigned To Recovery Mindset

Recently I feel I have been doing better in recovery than ever, with great days of eating LOTS more, resting more, accepting weight gain. On bad days though I’ve still struggled to eat my usual ‘safe’ recovery amount or keep to a conservative recovery routine without intense anxiety. Of course recovery is ups & downs […]

Categories
Anxiety In Recovery Motivation Other Eating Disorder Behaviours Recovery

Sundays…

Day of the week rules… In recent years I have hated Sundays and found them much harder to tolerate as both the eating disorder and loneliness could feel even worse. When I was working, I’d volunteer for the Sunday shifts as a way to distract myself and keep busy so that Sunday would slide by, […]

Categories
Anxiety In Recovery Lower Level Movement / Exercise Other Eating Disorder Behaviours Recovery Rewiring

Resting Is So Hard

Resting & relaxing can be the hardest & most exhausting thing in the world! In eating disorder recovery, we are always told we must rest, relax & heal. To most people, this probably sounds wonderful & peaceful – creating images of lolling about on a sofa, taking naps, reading books, watching Netflix & generally just […]

Categories
Emotion Lower Level Movement / Exercise Motivation Recovery Restriction Rewiring

Why The Low Mood?

Hitting a little low patch… Throughout this recovery so far, it’s been an emotional rollercoaster but the past 2 days have been tougher than my usual dips. Tears, anxiety, frustration, anger & general pissed off-edness had become my norm, intermixed with feelings of exhilaration, achievement, success & even occasional playfulness! Lately things have been improving […]

Categories
Lower Level Movement / Exercise Other Eating Disorder Behaviours Recovery Rewiring

Watching Good Films!

Last night I watched The King’s Speech. It’s a film I have wanted to see since it came out 9 years ago! Films are one thing I have missed out a lot on during the years of having an Eating Disorder & I know that I am far from alone in that. The primary reason […]

Categories
Recovery

Attempting To Push Faster

Today is the start of a new week and I wanted to start it with a bang in terms of ED recovery! 💥 💥💥💥💥💥💥Overcoming an eating disorder can be feel like a painfully slow process at times and the go low and slow approach that is often used in traditional treatment is one I have […]

Categories
Fear Foods Recovery

Using Negative Emotions To Force Change

These cinnamon Danish pastries have been taunting me for a while now… When I see them I keep looking, picking them up, putting them back and allowing ED that small victory.Today had been a tough day of high anxiety and frustration at ED and myself for not beating it more.🥮🥮🥮🥮🥮This afternoon I connected with all […]